Ask Arora

Suits

Arora — Mon, 20 Oct 2008 02:09:43 +0000

SUITS

What You’ll Need: It’s called suits, take a wild fucking guess…

Before You Start: Everyone should have a drink of their choice. Then deal everyone a card face up until a spade is dealt. That person is the dealer.

How its Played:

The Dealer begins by calling out a suit, then dealing a card to everyone until that suit shows up.
That player must drink for the amount of seconds valued on the card.
**Before the player touches his glass down to the table, he must call the next suit! If not, he will drink the card value again.

Face Values

ACE - 15sec
K, Q, J - 10sec
10-2 are the same as its number

Game play continues until you lame asses feel cool enough to head to club. Cheers!

Suggest a game and tell Arora how its played. If it’s good, you’ll get a free bottle opener!

3Man

Arora — Mon, 20 Oct 2008 01:20:42 +0000

3Man

You’ll Need: 2 dice and at least 2 people at least pretending to be at least your friends (paid actors are OK too)

Before You Start

Everyone rolls; the first to roll a 3 (or 2-1) is the 3Man. This douche will drink every time a 3 is rolled.

Roll Chart

1 - 1 Create a Rule (ie: anyone who uses the word “ass” throughout the game, drinks)
4 - 1 Chin Last person to touch their chin drinks
Doubles If a double is rolled, roller chooses someone to drink dice value (ie: 2-2 = 2 drinks/shots)
Value of 9 If any combination of 9 is rolled, everyone joins a Waterfall whereas everyone begins to drink. No one is allowed to stop drinking until the person to their right decides to stop, beginning with the roller.
Value of 7 Person to the left of the roller drinks.
Value of 11 Person to the right of the roller drinks.
Double 3s Roller assigns 3 drinks to any 1 person… and of course the 3Man drinks.. twice!

How Its Played

1. Beginning with the person to the left of the 3Man, roll the dice and follow the rule from the Roll Chart

2. Roller will continue to roll until he rolls a no-value combination (any combo not on the chart) at which he’ll pass to the left

3. The douchey 3Man remains the douche of the game until he rolls 1-2 or 3-3, he then assigns someone else the title of 3Man and can opt out the game if he’d like.

The LOSER of the game is the last person left, who is also the final 3Man, and also the biggest douche to walk the face of the earth. Cheers!

Beer Pot

Arora — Sat, 18 Oct 2008 16:05:07 +0000

Equipment: 1 giant black Witch’s troft purchased from a Scottish Leprechaun… or a large pitcher.

FORMATION

Everyone gathers around in a circle surrounding the large pot, each player adding 1 beer to it.

Let the Games Begin!

One person starts drinking (with/without a straw). (S)He can drink as much as he wants. When done, the person to the left does the same going around the circle. The Winner is the person who drinks the last of it. The Loser is the one who drank before the winner.

The Loser puts 2 beers in the next game while the Winner puts none.

This game is a simple as it gets; strategy is the key. The winner is the one who empties the pot - regardless of how much is in it!

My Pot vs Your Beer

Arora — Mon, 22 Sep 2008 16:59:57 +0000

Arora,

My girl’s been telling me to stop getting lit. She thinks I’m a pothead. But I’m not a pothead. I work and go to class, even run a couple times a week. So I told her to quit drinking and she claims its completely different. She even calles me stupid for even demanding that. She said only a pothead would say that…She’s mean…and I’m not a pothead!

San Fran, Cali

Answer:

Click here to view the embedded video.

Dating a “Gamer”

Arora — Mon, 15 Sep 2008 00:48:44 +0000

Arora,

In slight response to “killing her with kindness,” guys seem to love the chase and stupid mind games too. In my experience guys loose interest if you’re honest and straight forward which is how I like to be (most the time…). My thought is I dont really know how to be anything other than what I am. Any good comments or suggestions if I want to risk it with a “gamer”?

Anonymous

Answer:

First know Arora gives you credit for admitting the game exist, though at times you hate it, and still mannin’-up and tackling it. Very cool. (ArorA credits value 1/1000 of 1 American cent. Can be redeemed for idiocy at participating Wal-Marts)

Click here to view the embedded video.

Dude, that guy needs to get laid… and he does! Solution found.

Arora’s advice to you is that if you’re gonna give it a shot with a gamer, play by the rules. The dating scene is just our species’ way of finding 2 things: a person we can be vulnerable with, and a reason to put out without feeling like a slut. Sounds terribly blunt, but thats it!

Now there’s nothing wrong with being yourself. But that means tell him the basics - your favorite song, kinda shows you’re into, what wakes you up in the morning - shallow shit! Build an attraction. Let his hormones tell him whether or not he wants to see you tomorrow. The problem most people in your situation have, is rather then be yourself, you’re confessing. Thats like adding milk to the chemistry. Both in conversation and body language you let the guy know everything else - thats what the dating scene it for! You’re there for the same reason he is, you’re no different.

…

… except for one thing: if he were to be straight forward and honest you’d probably appreciate it and move closer rather than away (hence the question). That does bring up another issue on fear.

….

If you were job hunting and knew that there her dozens of jobs out there you were a shoe-in for, you wouldn’t care if someone didn’t hire you. You’d move on to the next one! Hell if Arora realized during the interview that he, himself didn’t want the job, he’s start talking about the 10 years he spent as a goat farmer in Calcutta and that boil on his ass he needs motor oil to get rid of. You have a fear of numbers that the gamer doesn’t. If you don’t make it with this guy, who the f*ck cares?! There’s hundreds of guys out there, date way! What’s the worse that could happen on a date? You walk out?

…..

Arora says don’t be so tense and eager to see if it’ll work. Relax and tease! Find out what his vice is. Use your bootie babe! It’ll keep up his interest, boost your confidence, teach you a lot about guys, and increase your chance of possibly having the honor of kickin’ it with Arora. He’s got plenty of motor oil!

Are you Lame? Probably? Yea, it’s OK. Click here and let Arora take care of you.

Beer Pong (Beirut) House Rules

Arora — Thu, 11 Sep 2008 18:07:31 +0000

FORMATION

Ten cups in a triangle formation. 6 cups have also been used for the light wait drinkers. Also known as 2 Can Sam’s and 2 Beer Queers. Standard pong cups are Solo Brand cups shown in the photo.

Fill the cups about a quarter to a third of the way up with your beer of choice.

GETTING STARTED

Two opposing players stare each other dead in the eye and throw on the count of three. The one who lands a cup begins the game. *That cup doesn’t count.

HOW ITS PLAYED

Each player stands arm’s length from the table and tosses the ball into the opposing team’s cup. When a cup is landed, a player from that team must drink it! After each player from the team has shot, the next team goes. The team who is forced to drink all their cups loses and the game is over. It’s not rocket science.

*If both players on one team land a cup, they receive Ball Backs and get to go again.

*If both players on one team land the same cup, the game is over, they win! (the rule stands if that cup is on the table or in hand)

Bounce/Blow/Finger

Bounce: Rather than toss directly into the cup, a player can bounce off table.

Blow: If the ball spirals in the cup, a player can blow into the cup forcing it out.

Finger: If a ball spirals into the cup, a player can scoop it out with their finger.

*Chicks Bounce. Chicks Blow. Chicks Fingerblast. NO EXCEPTIONS*

RE-RACKS

Teams may re-rack the opposing team’s cup to increase their odds.

The first re-rack is with 6 cups in the triangle formation as shown.

Next is the diamond with 4 cups, 1, 2, 3, and 5 (Also seen in 2,3,4,5 form)

Then the 3 cup triangle formation, 1, 2, 3.

Finally the two cup in a vertical line, 1, 5 with cups touching.

*Players are not limited on re-racks. However, during a game of teams a re-rack cannot be called once one teammate has shot - only before any member has thrown.

REDEMPTION

When a team has lost, they still have a final redemption in which each player of the team is allowed to continue shooting until they miss. If the team is successful in landing all reaming cups, both teams go into OVERTIME, in which the game restarts from 3cup triangle formation.

Celebrity Shots

Each team is allowed up to 2 celebrity shots in which any bystander at the party is allowed to substitute a shot for the team. The house rules apply to the celebrity despite how cool they think they are.

And don’t worry, even Arora gets a celebrity shot once in a while… only it’s charity work.

Party Foul

If a cup spills, it counts. If it’s intentional or it’s the final cup, it doesn’t.

Ultimate Beer Pong

You may want bigger teams.

…unless of course you’re Arora.

Want to add a game or suggest a rule to these? Leave a reply; if its good, you’ll get a AskArora Bottle Opener!

Drinking Games!

Arora — Thu, 11 Sep 2008 18:02:15 +0000

European game with an Irish jig! KINGS: Rule the world, drunk!

BeerPot (its not what you think) 3Man Suits

*AskArora.com does not condone over drinking/binge drinking. If you get duffed beyond belief, it’s because you should have stopped drinking long before throwing-up on Kevin’s girlfriend and wrecking your Dad’s car. Please drink responsibly.

KINGS

Arora — Thu, 11 Sep 2008 17:41:40 +0000

You’ll Need: Deck of Cards, Empty Cup, Beer of choice

Rules: Cards are scattered face down around an empty cup. Each play flips a card and performs the rule.

You. Pick someone at the table to drink.

Me. You, yourself has a drink.

Floor. The last person to touch the floor drinks.

Guys. All the guys have to drink.

Chics. All the girls have to take off their pants!… just fuckin; girls drink.

Heaven. Last person to point to the sky drinks.

Great! Everyone drinks!

Rhyme. Person picks a word and going clockwise, everyone says a word that rhymes with it. The one who fux up drinks.

Catagories. Person picks a topic (ie. American cars) and going clockwise everyone must contribute. The one who fux up, drinks!.

Rule. Player creates a rule that all must follow. The one who breaks it, drinks! Keep it simple, ie. you must drink with your left hand.

“Never Have I Ever” Player tells everyone something they have never done. Anyone who’s done it, drinks!

KINGS! Pick this card and you must fill the center cup a quarter of the way up. The person who picks the final king, drinks the cup… and in one shot! No nursing, bitch!

Waterfall. Everyone drinks at the same time. Starting from the one who chose the card, no one can stop drinking until the person to his/her left stops. Man up!

Killed Her with Kindness

Arora — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 18:09:31 +0000

Arora,

OK, so my girlfriend dumped me cuz I was too nice to her. I love her still, what should I do?

Kindness Killer

Answer:

That’s pretty lame, bro… Pretty f*’n lame indeed.

But it’s OK. To be perfectly honest, ladies like nice guys. Immature high school girls like assholes. So you really shouldn’t try and get her back by changing yourself, rather do your thing and find another.

When a girl tells you you’re too nice, it doesn’t mean you give too much money to the poor or spend too much time at the children’s hospital. It means you’re being a little bitch bye smothering her and not giving her anything to work for. If you remember one fact, only 1 fact about a girl for the rest of your life, let it be this, girls like to think they’ve figured a guy out. (nice right? that’s more important than periods!)

You know when you were young and working on a puzzle. If it was easy, you got through it and moved on. But if it took you a week to figure it out, you were bragging to the world of your life-rewarding accomplishment. Yea man, girls are the same way. They want to get to know you and in the process get you to fall for them. If you’re all over em giving flowers and surprising them with candle lit dinners, talking your ass off about your drunk father and pedophile uncle, she’s not going to feel like the process was much of a task. If you ask more questions, talk less, keep the gifts to a minimum, and worry more about yourself she’ll secretly (and very much consciously) try and change you, and in the process fall for you!

So what’s a wuss to do now? You should probably take this as a loss and learn for the next one. When a chic learns of your extremely sensitive, needy for a mother’s boob side before imagining what your wild, self-riteous, spit in my mouth side is like, it’s pretty hard to make the 180*.

But if you must try, my advice to you is to chill back, give her a lot less attention than you were (and were planning on). But, you SHOULD let her see you with your chin in the air flirting with the flock and on your complete A game. And not A-, remember you already f*cked this one up. She’ll come around with conversation when she sees something she didn’t think was there. Thats when you come back to Arora, we’ll take it from there.

Always f*ckin’ it up for yourself? Tell me about it.

Answerables

Arora — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 13:51:40 +0000

Arora,

Answer these.

Ballsy in Boston

Answer:

Click here to view the embedded video.

Feelin’ Ballsy? Ask me a Question.